Sisters

Preparing for the Wilderness Journey

The first week after my marriage ended was similar to the time following a death.  I think I was in shock.  Thankfully I had family and friends who walked beside me each step of the way.  My kids were especially supportive of me even though they were going through their own grieving process.  I won’t share their stories just because they are their stories.  Suffice to say they had too experienced difficulties as they grew up. 

I went to work on Monday and Tuesday of that week.  My sister Pat who lives in Georgia showed called to say she’d be there on Wednesday to help me with so many decisions that needed to be made as soon as possible.  She booked a room in a hotel for the first night so that I could just talk.  For the first time in a long time I was able to open up and be honest with someone about the state of my marriage.  It was my first taste of freedom. 

I wasn’t ready to permanently move out of the house but I didn’t want to stay there either.  I needed a refuge for a while.  A friend of my sister graciously allowed me to stay with her in her townhouse until I could make other arrangements.  This friend Ann became a dear friend to me during the time I was with her.  Her kindness and welcoming spirit were just what I needed at that time.  Pat also stayed with her for the rest of that week.  Being in the company of two such wonderful and godly women was just what this sad scared little girl needed.  The shared fellowship and food blessed me in ways I could never have imagined.  I am forever grateful.

My sister has always been older than me. J  When we were younger I resented the times when, in my opinion, she bossed me around.  (She knows this, we laugh about it now!)  As I look back I realize that most of the time she was just trying to take care of me.  Well let me tell you, I didn’t resent her caring for me at this time.  Those next few days she was with me at the lawyers when I filed divorce papers, when I opened a new bank account, and when I purchased my very first cell phone.  Her presence during this time gave me the confidence I needed to do what had to be done.  The most important thing she did was to listen to me.  Having a second pair of ears to listen as I made these decisions was invaluable to me. 

On April 12^th I wrote in my journal:

“In my Bible reading today the Israelites entered Canaan, the promised land.  They ate of its produce (Joshua 5:12) and there was no more manna.  God has been protecting and providing for me all these years but He has delivered me from Egypt (v. 9), my marriage and is bringing me into a better place.  Pat left today.”

When my sister went home she left me in the best place I could be at that stage of my journey.  Her love and support set me on the path I needed to be on to heal and eventually flourish.  What a blessing she is to my life.

There is a phrase in scripture I had never noticed before.  When I typed “sister” into Bible Gateway search I found:

“…and his mother’s sister…”  Mary was not alone at the cross.  She had the support of her sister.  I’m so thankful for my sister who stood by me during those difficult days.  The load I carried on my journey was lighter because she stood by my side.

I entitled this blog post as Preparing for the Wilderness Journey because I was no longer in Egypt but I certainly wasn’t in my own personal promised land.  It would take a long trek before I arrived there.  God was preparing me to enter the desert where I learned to solely depend on Him.  First a wedding, then the journey begins.