Love one another!

Journal entry:

October 18, 2003

“What a wonderful day! New members breakfast at a member’s home. Several people from my class were there helping. I enjoyed talking to the young seminary students. The food was excellent. Praise God for these wonderful people. Did some shopping, home, cleaned apartment, and puttered around. Listened to UK football game and watched a Gaither special. What a great day! ‘Thank You, Lord. You are so good to me! I love You!’”

October 19, 2003

“Sunday School and church were great. After that it was a hard day. I watched families and friends leave together and I felt so alone. Went home to a microwave meal. Back to church at 4 because there was supposed to be a choir prayer meeting. Locked up tight. I started crying. Went home and cried most of the rest of the day. I am so lonely. ‘Lord, please help me to focus on others and if I am doing something wrong please reveal it to me. Thank You for always being with me. I love You and I choose to believe You and Your word.’”

What a contrast in days.  Reading this these many years later I believe I see what happened.  On Saturday I attended an event where everyone was alone.  Except for the hosts and people helping them we were all new to Ninth & O.  I belonged.  I was one of them.  And my focus wasn’t on myself.   

“I enjoyed talking to the young seminary students.”  I was focused on others.  These were young people away from home and in a new environment.  I remember that they didn’t know anyone else there that day.  I had people from my class who knew my name and was welcomed warmly by them.  Two things to note about this:  I took the focus off myself and I was comfortable talking with people I didn’t know.  Big steps for this girl.

Sunday.  “I started crying.  Went home and cried most of the rest of the day.  I am so lonely.”    Notice who the focus is on: “I”.  Instead of being grateful for a sweet time of study, worship, and fellowship I pouted.  That’s just a plain fact.  I’m not saying my feelings didn’t matter.  I’m saying that instead of pouting I could have done something.  Reached out to someone.  And when no one was at church at 4 I reacted differently than I did on Saturday:  “Did some shopping, home, cleaned apartment, and puttered around.  Listened to UK football game and watched a Gaither special.”  Instead of enjoying my time at home I cried. 

Now listen, loneliness is a real emotion and it hurts.  However, I’ve learned that sometimes I choose loneliness instead of choosing to reach out to others.  I’ve realized over the years that a quick cure for loneliness is to find another lonely person and invite them into your life.  Sit by someone who’s alone at church, call an acquaintance who you know lives alone, call a family member and talk to them.  I will tell you there are days that I’m preaching this to myself.  I’ll admit that this is not easy for me even today, but I am doing better. 

Learn to seek out the lonely.  On days when you’re having a wonderful time don’t forget what it feels like to be lonely.  Don’t overlook the person sitting quietly in the corner.  Don’t pass by the stranger sitting in the pew.  Get out of your comfort zone because that’s where God works best.

I really like this quote:

When you care you will do something.  So ask God to help you to care.

After all, Jesus Himself said to:

Love like Jesus.  What a wonderful world that would be!

Father,

I want to love like Jesus.

I fall far short of that goal.

Place in my heart the love He has for me.

Then let it spill over onto others.

In Jesus’ Name,

Amen