Journal entry:
October 16, 2003
“Talked to Pat. Going to retreat in Georgia in February with Lisa Harper-can’t wait!”
Two
sentences. There’s a lot contained in
these 15 words.
“Talked to Pat.” Why is this important? Because
while I was married I didn’t talk to my sister on the phone that much
especially after they moved away from Kentucky.
We would check in with each other occasionally but our relationship was
not close. From the moment she came to
be with me right after my marriage ended until our time together at Praise Gathering
we had grown closer. To be honest, we
don’t always talk a lot today but there is a closeness and friendship to our
relationship that means everything to me.
I’m so thankful for the seeds that were being sown that have deep root
in our sisterhood.
“Going to retreat in Georgia in February with Lisa Harper-can’t
wait!” In these words I see
hope. I see independence. I see anticipation. I didn’t have to get permission to take a
trip by myself. I wasn’t made to feel
guilty because I was doing something for me.
I looked forward not just to the retreat but to time with Pat and
Rebecca. I was excited about the
opportunity to hear Lisa speak, not just once, but several times that
weekend. I anticipated being with other Christian women
who wanted to grow in their walk with Jesus.
I was free.
Freedom is
something we must not take lightly. Too
many people in this world don’t have the freedoms we have. Even someone who lives next door to you may
not be free. We don’t know what goes on
in people’s lives. People to be slaves
to many things: governments, false religions, other people, drugs, alcohol, food,
etc. I am a slave to anything I choose
to serve, anything that controls my life.
Everyone is a slave to someone or something. It’s our choice whom we serve.
The paradox of
faith in Jesus Christ is that in surrendering my life to Him and becoming His servant,
I am set free. It really doesn’t make
sense, does it? It does once you live
it. I know I am safe in His hands and I want
to do what He wants me to do. I choose
from my own free will to follow Him. He
helps me overcome the fear that tries to rule my life. He gives me strength and wisdom to live life
that pleases God. In Him I am free!
In the fall of
2003 I was just beginning to know what freedom in my life meant. I still had a long road to travel and there
would be days of agony and tears. Yet,
through all of this God never left me.
He blessed me with opportunities like Praise Gathering and women’s
retreats to renew and refresh my spirit so that I could face the hard days that
were coming.
I’m reading a
book from Voice of the Martyrs about 8 women who suffered in ways I cannot even
imagine because of their faith in Jesus Christ. I’ve been convicted about my complaining about
inconveniences in my life as I read. My suffering was a walk on the beach compared
to what these women experienced. The one
thing I see in each life is that especially in the darkest moments God gave
each of them a tiny glimmer of hope. And
in those darkest hours those tiny lights shone bright and gave them what they
needed to persevere. Many times they were imprisoned but their souls remained free. That’s what serving
God through faith in His Son Jesus Christ does in a life. This is what true freedom is.
Father,
Freedom in Christ.
Paid for by His
blood.
Bestowed on my
because of Your love.
Glorious Freedom!
In His Name,
Amen
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