Remembering Day Two Continued

Journal Posting April 2, 2003 @ 9:00 p.m.

“I have been feeling sad and rejected even though no one has rejected me.  I am so grateful for God who is reminding me even now that He loves me with an unfailing unending love”
 “God is so good, God is so good, God is so good, He’s so good to me!”
 “Jesus is my Savior, my Redeemer, my Master, my Friend.  There is no other like Him.  Hallelujah-praise God!  The Holy Spirit is my Comforter, my Teacher, my Guide.  Take over every fiber of my being.  I yield all that I am, have and ever hope to be to You.  Thank You for allowing me to be a part of Your plan and Your work.”
 “My soul does magnify the Lord.”
 “Thank You for whatever it is You are doing in my life.  Amen!”

God is amazing!  I read these words and see how He was looking out for me before I knew I needed it.  He gave me thoughts and words that reminded me of His presence, grace, mercy, and provision; things I would desperately need in the days to come. 

Reflecting on my feelings of rejection days before I was rejected shows me that God was preparing me for the actual event in advance.   He knew my prayer for change in my marriage was going to be answered but not in the way I hoped.  He knew the plans He had for my life before I was born and the path it would take for me to fulfill them.  He was preparing me through the tough times for the purpose He has for my life.  The great thing is that I’m just now catching a glimpse of that purpose, but more about that at a later date.

For now I just want to remember this time of sadness and joy, despair and hope, fear and trust, doubt and faith, and, to my surprise, total surrender I see in the words written by this desperate child of God.  I’m so thankful He is leading me down memory lane before revealing the next step He has prepared on this journey called life.

I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you,

not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.

Jeremiah 29:11 MSG