Where Can I Find:

Thoughts for Cheri:

Prayer continued:

“I am so bored in my job.  I do it to the best of my ability but it is so slow right now.  I have been thankful for the lack of stress, the benefits, the hours, and seeing Tanya every day.  I’m also thankful for being here with her during this difficult time as she recovers from her miscarriage.  I am thankful for the kind people who work here and for the friendships I’ve developed over these years.”

“However, I am now experiencing a desire for something more challenging.  My gifts, talents, and interests are taking root as I discover who I am and who You created me to be.  I desire a place of service.  I desire a flexible schedule in a setting where I can travel, work at home, and in an office.  I don’t know where or what this would be but if it is from You, You do.”

“I want to write, I want to visit people, I want to teach or counsel.  I am willing to be trained however You provide for me to be.  I want a place where I can learn as I serve and grow in my ministry to which I believe You have called me.”

“However, I am now experiencing a desire for something more challenging.”  This is the first glimmer of a prayer that grew into something amazing and led me to where I am today.  I had ideas of what I thought I wanted and God has granted some of them.  Some of them are no longer desires of my heart.  Some of them are still glowing embers in my soul that may fan into flames one day.  The point is, I had these desires, I professed them to God, and I trusted Him to answer in His time and His will.  That’s what praying in Jesus’ name is all about.

“I desire, I desire, I want, I want, I want, I want.”  Lots of “I” statements in there.  That’s okay.  God wants to hear our heart’s desires.  The key, however, is “I don’t know where or what this would be but if it is from You, You do.”  “If” is a big little word.  In this case it signifies my willingness to accept His will for my life, my desires.  I laid my requests before Him in expectation that He would answer in His time and His purpose.  That’s what prayer is. 

When I’ve laid my requests before God I am to leave them there and allow His peace to fill my life and guard my heart and mind.  That’s just one of the benefits of having Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior.  I hope that anyone who is reading this and doesn’t know Him will seek Him and invite Him into your life so you will know this peace that passes all understanding.  If you do know Him, trust His heart and His plans.  It’s the only way to live!

Father,

Only You can give me perfect peace.

This perfect peace comes from knowing Jesus Christ as Savior & Lord of my life.

Thank You for this marvelous gift.

In His Precious Name,

Amen

In Prayer Be:

Thoughts for Cheri:

February 26, 2004

“God is bringing to my attention through ladies Bible study, scripture reading, and my devotionals the need to be bold in my requests.  I want to be bold and I want to ask in Jesus’ name so that I will be asking for what He desires in my life.”

This week I will be sharing a prayer I wrote.  Here’s the beginning:

“Father, I want to be bold in my asking.  I want to be in Your will in my asking.  I pray that Your Spirit will guide me as I present my desires and needs to You.”

Because of Jesus Christ I can be bold in the presence of God.  I need not be timid or fearful in making my requests known to Him.  What I do need to be is genuine in my desire for His will to be done in my life.  I need to ask in the name of Jesus. 

What I must remember is that when I ask in His name I must ask for something that agrees with His character and purpose.  It also must please Him.  When I ask in His name I choose to represent Him to the world.  That’s a serious position to be in and I cannot take it lightly. 

That being said I do not have to fear asking for the wrong thing.  If I’m genuinely seeking His will I need to be open to His leading.  It’s in the asking that He can change my heart and place His will and purpose in my life. 

I didn’t know it then but this prayer was the beginning of major changes in my life.  Some requests have been answered.  Others have not.  Some may be on hold.  Others may never happen. 

That’s the thing about prayer.  When I pray in Jesus’ name I place my life in His hands.  I give Him power and authority to shape what my life looks like each day.  There are certainly no better hands to be in than those that formed me, hold me, guide me, and protect me. 

 

Be bold before Your Father.  But be ready for Him to answer in ways that may surprise you.  I can tell you from experience He often gives me what I ask for but not what I expected.  It is always what’s best.  He is God after all!

Father,

You honor my prayer when I come boldly before Your throne in the name of Jesus.

You change my heart and mind to match Your perfect will.

I am so thankful to be held in Your loving hands.

You are God alone!

In Jesus’ Name,

Amen

Patience

I posted this on Facebook today:

 “Yesterday when I was going through KFC drive through there were 3 cars ahead of me. The lady asked for my order and it didn't appear on the screen. A couple of minutes later she apologized and asked me to repeat it. I did. I pulled forward and waited my turn. When I got to the window she apologized again saying it was really hectic at that moment. She acted surprised that I wasn't angry or upset with her. I told her it wasn't a big deal and not to worry about it."

Before I go on let me say there was a time I probably would have gotten impatient and showed it. Thankfully God has worked on me in the past few years and shown me what really matters and what doesn't. Having to repeat my order when I'm sitting in my car waiting to be served is not a big deal. Her whole demeanor changed just because I was kind. It cost me nothing except a few words. No big deal. I just wonder how many opportunities to be kind and change someone's day I've missed because I've been absorbed with me and my needs.

"How many times a day does God give me to be a witness for Him? How many times a day do I miss it or blow it? Food for thought.”

Since I’m in a “quiet” week with my journal I’m looking for nudges from God on what to write about.  I had the above picture saved on my computer and when I saw it this morning I thought about my experience at KFC so I wrote about it on Facebook.  I was thinking about my blog and realized this also applies to my past and my marriage.  Not the kindness part, the waiting patiently part.

Waiting was a mixed bag for my ex and me.  I could wait for him for hours and hours and it was all right.  I learned to not express frustration or anger if I had to wait.  I brought a book, people watched, slept, etc. to pass the time away.  This was before cell phones or tablets with games.  I felt and stuffed my anger deep inside.  It was not healthy.

If he had to wait for me for 5 minutes it was too long.  I can still feel the apprehension and sometimes downright fear I felt when I realized an errand I was running was taking longer than it should (not my fault) and he was waiting in the car.  I remember being gone from home to the grocery or other errands and being fearful I wouldn’t get home when expected.  I always heard about it in the most unpleasant ways.  I learned to adapt.  If I couldn’t do anything about the delay I prepared myself for the consequences as best I could.  It just became a fact of my life.

Like in other areas that were affected by ex I swung all the way to the other end of the pendulum when my marriage ended.  I became impatient whenever I had to wait on anyone or anything at any time.  It’s only been in the last couple of years that I’ve noticed a change in myself.  I’m less stressed when I have to wait.  I’m less judgmental of people who make me wait.  I’ve developed ways to cope when I’m waiting.  It’s been very freeing.

Confession time:  The one place I’m still quite impatient is in my car.  I figure the person I’m yelling or fussing at can’t hear me and to be honest, sometimes it helps me let off steam.  I don’t do anything to create road rage in the other person but I do express myself to myself.  I’ve asked God to work in me in this area too because He sees and knows what I do even when I’m alone.  What I do when I’m alone reflects who I am when I’m with others.  His word says:

I still feel that impatience too often when I have to wait.  However, I’ve learned to recognize it and, most of the time, deal with it.  Sometimes I find it necessary to explain to those who’ve known me a long time why I’m doing what I’m doing.  I’m not trying to rush them; I’m calming myself.  

My family will tell you I have a lot of my dad in me.  He was definitely not a patient “waiter”.  That’s why I know it is God working in me because it’s not in my nature or my upbringing to be patient.  Every time I catch myself doing it is a victory that I celebrate with my Father.  It means He’s still working on and in me. 

I like this quote:

God uses the hard things in my life to conform me to His purpose.  He teaches and changes me through the big and little trials and difficulties I face each day.  The fact that He’s working on me means I’m His child and He loves me.  What sweet assurance this is to this seeking child!

Father,

Patience.

Not one of my gifts.

It is a fruit of the Holy Spirit Who lives in me.

Thank You for pruning me so that this fruit sweetens my witness.

In Jesus’ Name,

Amen

Through It All

I stayed home from work yesterday because I was sick.  This may not seem like a big deal to many people but for me it is.  Let me explain.

When I was growing up one of my fondest memories is of lying on the couch and being taken care of by my mom.  I remember Jell-O and Campbell’s Chicken Noodle Soup and feeling safe and warm and loved.  One of my favorite memories is during my recovery after having my tonsils removed.  I didn’t crave ice cream like many do.  The thing I remember that tasted the best was my mom’s bread and gravy.  Maybe it was the warmth and softness but to this day that’s one of my comfort foods.

Flash forward to my adult years.  Being sick was almost a sin.  There was no coddling by my husband.  I did manage to create a comfortable setting for my kids when they got sick (which was not often, thank the Lord!) even though it did get more difficult as they got older because he expected them to be working too.  But for me if I wasn’t sick enough to be flat on my back in bed I was well enough to work.  There was no sympathy or tender care offered by my ex.  I realize now this was from the way he was raised but it hurt and it ingrained in me a fear of calling in sick when I began working in the public arena. 

This April will be 14 years since my marriage ended.  With God’s help and the wonderful support and counsel of many people I’ve overcome many issues that arose in the years I was married.  However, for some reason the aversion to calling in sick is still with me.  I feel like I’ll be punished if I do.  I know that I won’t because I work at a wonderful place with great people and sick day’s benefits but that old dread lingers. 

Yesterday I woke up with 101+ (closer to 102) temp, stuffy nose, sore throat, sneezing, coughing, and can’t breathe.  The only reason I didn’t go to work was the temp because I figured I was contagious and didn’t want to infect anyone else.  I still felt guilty about it.  Kinda sad isn’t it.

You might wonder why I’m blogging about this.  This is the week when nothing in my journal stood out so I wasn’t sure what I was going to do.  When I thought about it this morning I realized there is a lesson to be gleaned from this experience.

So many things are ingrained in us from our life experiences.  These can be positive or negative, helpful or harmful, good or bad.  It can be done through actions or words that create confidence or insecurity, courage or fear, self-esteem or self-doubt, life or death.

Life or death?  Yes, it is that important.  Our actions and words can determine if someone lives life to the fullest or dies a little inside and just exists.  I realize that even with all the good things God gave to me when I was married I was just existing.  Words had drained the life out of me over time.  The lack of love and true affection made me feel worthless.  My children were what I lived for and that’s okay.  But they grew up and left home.  As they should.  I needed more and it was there all the time.  Faith.

I know now that my faith in God that was always there is what sustained me and brought me through those days.  There has always been an underlying current of faith deep in me that’s carried me through many days of trials and sorrows.  You notice I said through, not out of, away from, under, or over.  Through.  That’s the word.  No matter what our past or present God gets us through.  We are not worthless.  Jesus gave His life for us.  His life, death, and resurrection bring us through this fallen world to a place in His kingdom.  This song says it so well:

Just a thought:  it always amazes me where God takes me on these posts.  Most days I start out with a preconceived idea or no idea at all on what I’m going to say and most days where I end up is miles away from where I started.  I wrote earlier that there was a lesson to be learned from my sick day experience.  Hmmm?  Even I didn’t know what that lesson was until God revealed it to me as I wrote.  Every day is a journey filled with unexpected lessons from my Father.  I just need to open my life to Him.  I love it!

Father,

Your love is amazing!

Thank You!

In Jesus’ Name,

Amen

Psalm 139

In reading back over my journal for the week of February 20-25, 2004 the event that stood out was Tanya’s miscarriage and I wrote about that on January 17.  Everything else was just daily life, maybe because that was such a traumatic experience so nothing else really mattered.  That means I really don’t have anything to write about this week from my journal.  Let’s see where God leads.

If there’s one word that stands out to me as I look back over my life I think it would be “presence”.  God’s presence.  Somehow I’ve just always known He is with me.  Even as a child I just knew Jesus loved me and was with me.  Yes, there was a moment in time when I realized I needed Him as Savior but even before that I never doubted His presence in my life.  To be honest I don’t understand this but I’m oh so grateful.  I believe this assurance is one of the reasons Psalm 139 is my favorite. 

The All-Knowing, Ever-Present God

For the choir director. A Davidic psalm.

¹ Lord, You have searched me and known me.
² You know when I sit down and when I stand up; You understand my thoughts from far away.
³ You observe my travels and my rest; You are aware of all my ways.
⁴ Before a word is on my tongue, You know all about it, Lord.
⁵ You have encircled me; You have placed Your hand on me.
⁶ This extraordinary knowledge is beyond me.  It is lofty; I am unable to reach it.

⁷ Where can I go to escape Your Spirit?  Where can I flee from Your presence?
⁸ If I go up to heaven, You are there; if I make my bed in Sheol, You are there.
⁹ If I live at the eastern horizon or settle at the western limits,
¹⁰ even there Your hand will lead me; Your right hand will hold on to me.
¹¹ If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me, and the light around me will be night”—
¹² even the darkness is not dark to You.  The night shines like the day; darkness and light are alike to You.

¹³ For it was You who created my inward parts; You knit me together in my mother’s womb.
¹⁴ I will praise You because I have been remarkably and wonderfully made. Your works are wonderful, and I know this very well.
¹⁵ My bones were not hidden from You when I was made in secret, when I was formed in the depths of the earth.
¹⁶ Your eyes saw me when I was formless; all my days were written in Your book and planned before a single one of them began.

¹⁷ God, how difficult Your thoughts are for me to comprehend; how vast their sum is!
¹⁸ If I counted them, they would outnumber the grains of sand; when I wake up, I am still with You.

¹⁹ God, if only You would kill the wicked—you bloodthirsty men, stay away from me— ²⁰ who invoke You deceitfully.  Your enemies swear by You falsely.
²¹ Lord, don’t I hate those who hate You, and detest those who rebel against You?
²² I hate them with extreme hatred; I consider them my enemies.

²³ Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my concerns.
²⁴ See if there is any offensive way in me; lead me in the everlasting way.

There is so much in these 24 verses but the theme I see the most is that God is with me.  He’s already wherever I may go, He knows all about me, and He wants what’s best for me. 

I will admit that vv. 19-22 use to bother me some.  They don’t seem to fit in these beautiful words spoken by David to God.  However, after living as many years as I have and seeing so much evil in this world I understand it a little better.  There are days when I just say, “Lord, please destroy the wicked.  Don’t allow those who oppose You to see another day.”  But then I say, “Your will be done.”  Only He knows what’s best for and in each life.  This plea for the end of wickedness is followed vv. 23-24 by a personal plea to search out and destroy any found in my own heart.  I need to pray this daily.

The message God has for whoever is reading this Psalm today may be different than the one He has for me.  It has changed for me over the years as the rhythm of my life has ebbed and flowed.  So please, open your mind and heart to the voice of God as you read David’s words.  Allow Him to whisper His personal message to you as He reveals just what you need to know at this point in your life.  That’s what He does you know.  He’s a personal God who loves you just as if you were His only child.  He’s known you since before you were in your mother’s womb.  He knows you today.  Trust His voice.

Father,

Thank You for this beautiful Psalm that speaks to us individually and as a people.

Open eyes, hearts, minds, and souls to the words we need each need to hear from You.

Then help us to do as You ask.

In Jesus’ Most Precious Name,

Amen.

Steps of Faith

February 13, 2004

Thoughts for Cheri:

“I do still feel anger and sadness but I’m able to process it by using the verse Cheri gave me about taking my thoughts captive.  When I find myself dwelling on unwanted or unhealthy thoughts I just wrap them up and give them to Jesus.  It works!”

“Actually, at the retreat last weekend I attended a session on self-esteem.  The two leaders used the chart for The Search for Significance to discuss this.  I had just started reading this and had reached the chart but didn’t feel up to processing the information.  This session enabled me to do that.  They talked about how our thoughts affect us and gave verses we could use to conquer negative thoughts.  After the session I went to one of them and told them about 2 Corinthians 10:5 and how it had helped me to heal.  She thanked me and wrote it down.  I saw her later and she told me that in the next session she had shared a little of my story and used that verse.  I like that!  Next time I hope to be able to speak up during a session or wherever I may be instead of waiting.  There was a time I would not have even shared with her, so I am growing.”

“Actually, at the retreat last weekend I attended a session on self-esteem.  The two leaders used the chart for The Search for Significance to discuss this.  I had just started reading this book and had reached the chart but didn’t feel up to processing the information.  This session enabled me to do that. They talked about how our thoughts affect us and gave verses we could use to conquer negative thoughts.”  Isn’t God good!  He knows what I need before I do.  He led me to the exact place in this book that I need to be in before the retreat.  I just love that!

“After the session I went to one of them and told them about 2 Corinthians 10:5 and how it had helped me to heal.  She thanked me and wrote it down.  I saw her later and she told me that in the next session she had shared a little of my story and used that verse.  I like that!”  This is one of the first times I remember using what God had shown me in my journey to help others.  It felt good.  He comforted me so that I could share His comfort with others just as His word tells us.

“Next time I hope to be able to speak up during a session or wherever I may be instead of waiting.  There was a time I would not have even shared with her, so I am growing.”  Baby steps of faith.  Sometimes that’s just what God asks of me.  I don’t have to leap off some massive cliff to prove I’m obedient.  The first tiny step is often the hardest.  The secret is to keep my eyes on Him and take that first step whatever it may be.  I like this quote by Sandi Patty:

I didn’t want to stay where I was so I began taking steps of faith.  God’s blessing from these first baby steps of faith gave me the confidence to take bigger steps.  Today this blog is a result of that baby step of faith 13 years ago this month.  To me that’s what amazing grace is all about.  I’m so thankful I’m a child of this King who knows what I need before I do and who gives such wonderful gifts to His child.  And I’m grateful He allows me to join Him in His kingdom work.  I am blessed!

Father,

Baby steps.

Sometimes that’s all You ask for.

Thank You for baby steps that lead to greater steps of faith!

Teach me to keep my eyes on You as I walk this journey called life.

In Jesus’ Name,

Amen

Covenant

February 13, 2004

Thoughts for Cheri:

“The fact that I’m divorced doesn’t bother me as much as it did because I realize now I was never married in the true sense of the word.  I meant my vows and I kept them but it takes two to make a covenant and he never meant his vows.”

“Covenant”:  “a usually formal, solemn, and binding agreement.”  This word is found 316 times in the English Standard Version of God’s word.  I think it must be rather important to Him. 

God always keeps His word, His covenant with His people. 

Throughout history it’s been the people who have broken their word to keep His commands.  Like I said, “it takes two to make a covenant”.  One cannot do it alone.  God always upholds His end of the promise but when we fail to do so we must reap the consequences.  The thing is, even when we do if we repent God is faithful to forgive and to restore our relationship.  He has promised:

Marriage is a covenant.  Two people stand before God and vow to love and honor each other “until death do us part”.  We all know marriages go through hard times but the ones that last are the ones in which both people honor the promises they made to each other and to God.  Jesus Himself spoke about the importance of this covenant.

I meant my vows and I believed the man I was marrying did too.  It wasn’t until years later that I found he did not.  He promised to love me and then told me he never had.  He promised to be faithful and was not.  He promised to honor me and did not.  That’s why I can say, “I realize now I was never married in the true sense of the word.”  God did not join us together because the promise made that day in 1971 was not true.  I know I was not perfect and there are things I would do differently in my marriage but I did keep my vows.  God blessed me for my faithfulness but He didn’t bless the marriage.  It’s really quite a shame because we could’ve had a wonderful life together if God had been obeyed and honored.

A covenant is and must be a sacred vow that is honored and holy.  I am so thankful that the covenant God has given to me through Jesus Christ is just that.  Jesus Himself referred to this at the Last Supper:

Unlike the covenant God made with Noah, Abraham, and other patriarchs, this blood covenant with Jesus cannot be broken by either party.  God made the promise that through acceptance of His Son we are covered by His sacrifice and nothing and no one can change that.  Again, scripture makes this promise:

Over the years people have broken promises made to me, some on purpose and some just because we’re all human.  I’ve broken promises I’ve made because I’m also human.  Isn’t is reassuring to know that there is one promise, one covenant that will stand forever because of One Man.

Father,

Thank You for Jesus!

In His Name,

Amen

The world can't take this away!

February 13, 2004

Thoughts for Cheri:

“Right now I’m content with my life.  There are things I would change if I could but the present is okay.  I believe I’m exactly where God wants me to be right now.  I have desires and dreams but I now understand the verse about being content whatever my circumstances.  It’s amazing and wonderful.  I feel deep abiding peace and joy that I’ve never experienced before.  It’s always present even when I cry or feel lonely.  I’m so thankful for this.”

“I feel deep abiding peace and joy that I’ve never experienced before.  It’s always present even when I cry or feel lonely.  I’m so thankful for this.”  Deep abiding peace and joy can only be from God.  Jesus Himself promised that those who follow Him will be given both of these:

If you have not experienced this peace and joy there is no way I can explain it.  It’s real and it’s wonderful.  To this day I’m never without His peace and joy.  Even when sadness strikes they are there like an underground stream flowing through my life.  This is what gives me hope even in the most difficult of days.  Paul’s words in Romans reflect this exactly:

I love the days when that underground stream bursts forth and hope flows out of me into the lives of others.  God gives hope so that as I trust Him I am filled with joy and peace which in turn produces more hope in me.  This hope, joy, and peace fills me to overflowing and bubbles over and splashes onto wounded souls around me.  This all comes from the love God has for His children.

I love being an instrument God uses to touch and change lives.  It just takes willingness to believe, trust, and grow in faith to make a difference for His Kingdom.

The world and its false promises can never give this to us.  Please, if you don’t know the One whose promises are always true please seek Him out today.  He’s waiting for you.  His name is Jesus.

Father,

Hope, peace, and joy come only from the love You give.

Open hearts and minds to Your truths today.

In Jesus’ Name,

Amen

Who makes your heart smile?

Journal Entry February 12, 2004:

“Went to Soulcare and had an epiphany.  I didn’t stay.  I just felt in my spirit I wasn’t supposed to be there.”

Thoughts for Cheri February 13, 2004

“RE: Soulcare.  I spent the day yesterday struggling with not wanting to go last night.  I prayed about it all day.  I did go because I just wasn’t sure if it was God or Satan and I know confusion is not from God.”

“During the opening worship service I kept asking God to direct me.  One of the first songs we sang was ‘Open the Eyes of My Heart, Lord.’  During this song I had one of my epiphanies.  The experience was the same as the time at the employment agency at Bardstown and when I planned to join SECC.  I knew God was telling me this was not in His plan for me right now.  The rest of the worship service reinforced that message and I felt a deep peace about this decision.  I continue to pray and worship and when the service ended, I went home, fixed a hot cup of tea, and relaxed.  I felt very sure in my spirit.”

“With this decision there was no fear of someone being angry with me or guilt that I should do this.  Actually the phrase that came to mind is that ‘it made my heart smile.’”

“Went to Soulcare and had an epiphany.  I didn’t stay.  I just felt in my spirit I wasn’t supposed to be there.”  Soulcare was the divorce recovery program at Southeast Christian Church.  I haven’t mentioned it before in my blog but I had attended several times.  At first I thought it was going to be good for me but as time went on I became less comfortable with the group I was in.  It seemed to be a ‘bash my ex’ group and I really wasn’t interested in that.  I wanted to heal.  Let me just say I’ve been a part of another divorce recovery group as a worker and it was a totally different experience.  This particular one just didn’t fit me.

“The experience was the same as the time at the employment agency at Bardstown and when I planned to join SECC.”  From blog post written June 27, 2016:  “Went to employment agency while I was in Bardstown.  Sat there 45 minutes waiting and Spirit working in me-I was in the wrong place.”  I got up and left and never looked back.  And if I had joined Southeast Christian Church I wouldn’t have gone to Ninth & O and would have never met Cheri.  This shows why it’s so important to be sensitive to the Spirit’s leading.  He knows the heart and mind of the Father and the Father knows what lies ahead.

“RE: Soulcare.  I spent the day yesterday struggling with not wanting to go last night.  I prayed about it all day.  I did go because I just wasn’t sure if it was God or Satan and I know confusion is not from God.”  I love how God leads me to seek His face and His will.  He doesn’t often just give the answer.  I have to invest myself in this endeavor called life.  He allows me to make choices-it’s called free will.  It would’ve been easier to just stay home but I would’ve missed such a blessing.  I do know that what God’s word says is true:

“During the opening worship service I kept asking God to direct me.  One of the first songs we sang was ‘Open the Eyes of My Heart, Lord.’  During this song I had one of my epiphanies…I knew God was telling me this was not in His plan for me right now.  The rest of the worship service reinforced that message and I felt a deep peace about this decision.  I continue to pray and worship and when the service ended, I went home, fixed a hot cup of tea, and relaxed.  I felt very sure in my spirit.”  This has happened to me several times in my life.  Times I’ve just known in my spirit that God was directing me through His Spirit.  The deep peace filled me in a way I’ve only experienced a few times in my life.  It was amazing. 

“With this decision there was no fear of someone being angry with me or guilt that I should do this.  Actually the phrase that came to mind is that ‘it made my heart smile.’”  This is the sweetest thought expressed in this post.  I was able to make my own decision without fear of judgment or recrimination.  That fact that it “made my heart smile” makes me smile today some 13 years later. 

From the moment my marriage ended until this very day God has and is doing an amazing work in my life.  Because of all the “heart smiles” He’s blessed me with I choose to put on the wardrobe He’s prepared for me.

On this Valentine’s Day as we show human love to others let us make sure we are wearing the love of God as seen in the sacrifice of Jesus Christ.  Then just as He makes our hearts smile so we can make others hearts smile too.

Father,

My heart smiles when I remember Your wonderful love for me.

Allow those smiles to shine through my life onto others so they will also smile.

In Jesus’ Name,

Amen

A Valentine that Matters!

February 12, 2004

Thoughts for Cheri:

“Last night I was thinking that sometimes I still just want to curl up in a ball in my bed so no one can touch me or hurt me.  No one did anything to me; just sometimes when I think about all that has happened and what he did to me, I just want it all to go away.  This feeling does pass and I jump right back into life.  I have been thinking about Jesus and how He must have felt knowing what He was facing.  Yet, He kept going and serving and loving.  All He had to do was say the word and His Father would have taken Him home.  Instead, He stayed and fulfilled His mission.  I don’t know what my future holds but I know it will in no way compare to what He experienced.  And He did it alone; I don’t have to because the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit are always with me.  What an awesome thought!”

I am amazed again at the words I wrote 13 years ago.  Not amazed at me; amazed at a God who loves me so much that He placed in me the faith and assurance to be able to write these thoughts.  These words came from the Holy Spirit who has guided me every step of the way my entire life.  He placed in my heart and mind reminders of the love Jesus showed to me through His life, death, and resurrection.  I’m so grateful.

Scripture records the words of Jesus as He taught His disciples:

These were hard words for them to hear and they didn’t understand.  For me they are sweet words to my ears, not because Jesus suffered these things but because He suffered them for me.  He knew what His mission was and He obeyed in spite of the price He would pay.  He paid it so I wouldn’t have to.  What a wonderful Savior and Friend is He!

“I don’t know what my future holds but I know it will in no way compare to what He experienced.  And He did it alone; I don’t have to because the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit are always with me.  What an awesome thought!”

A Holy God cannot look on sin.  That’s why we are separated from Him in our sinfulness.  Jesus came to change that once and for all.  To do this He had to take upon His sinless self the sins of the entire world.  His blood shed on that cross was the sacrifice needed to cover those sins.  This meant that God had to turn His back on His only begotten Son for this period of time.  For the first and only time Jesus was totally alone, separated from the presence of His Father so that I wouldn’t ever have to be.  When I accepted this sacrifice and made Jesus Savior and Lord of my life His blood washed me clean in the eyes of His Father.  He will never ever leave me alone.  His presence goes with me everywhere.  This is all because Jesus Christ was forsaken in my place.

An old hymn by Philip B. Bliss came to my mind as I wrote this:

“Man of Sorrows!” what a name
For the Son of God, who came
Ruined sinners to reclaim.
Hallelujah! What a Savior!

Bearing shame and scoffing rude,
In my place condemned He stood;
Sealed my pardon with His blood.
Hallelujah! What a Savior!

Guilty, vile, and helpless we;
Spotless Lamb of God was He;
“Full atonement!” can it be?
Hallelujah! What a Savior!

Lifted up was He to die;
“It is finished!” was His cry;
Now in Heav’n exalted high.
Hallelujah! What a Savior!

When He comes, our glorious King,
All His ransomed home to bring,
Then anew His song we’ll sing:
Hallelujah! What a Savior!

Please, if you don’t know this One who willingly sacrificed His life for you, call out to Him.  He’s waiting for you right now.  His love is enough.  This seems very appropriate for today:

Father,

I don’t understand why You sent Your Son for me.

I don’t understand why He willingly came for me.

I am just thankful You did and He did.

Hallelujah!  What a Savior indeed!

In His most precious Name,

Amen!